Rakhi Ka Swayamvar

Finally, I am starting my second innings here.

The reason of my comeback is Rakhi, the great drama queen ‘Rakhi Sawant’. Don’t get me wrong, I am not a Rakhi fan or something. Actually my friend Anuj suggested me to watch Rakhi Ka Swayamvar last week. I was like pagal hai kya? Mere paas aur kuchh kaam nahi hai jo mai TV mai Rakhi dekhunga! He convinced me by reminding the drama she made in the big boss. I started googling about the show before watching it. I was surprised to know that Rakhi Ka Swayamvar opened at 4.1 TRP, which is much above other Indian television shows. Rakhi Ka Swayamvar was viewed by over 28 million viewers across the country in the first week of launch. The show has also shown its wide reach, appealing to audiences across all age groups and geographies.

But let me warn you guys, you need to have the talent of enjoying this show. Not everyone can appreciate Rakhi :P. Here are my observations…

The show starts with...
“Muje jeendgi mai jo bhi mila hai, television se mila hai.
Ab muje talash hai, sachhe pyar ki, aur woh bhi television se hi milega.
Mai shaadi ka joda pahnugi, haatho mai mahendi rachaungi.
Fir ek safed ghodi pe beth kar, ek raaj kumar aayega.
Aur mere wahi mahendi wale haath, chum kar kahega I love you
Ye ke reality show nahi meri life hai life
Kyo ki mai dhundh rahi hu apna life partner, jee han shaadi karne wali hu mai
Sirf imagine par, agar aap mai hai woh baat, to le jaiye mera haath.. :)”
oy yar Rakhi, ek tu hi hai jo TV pe shadi karne ke liye soch sakti hai.

I was thinking ki yar Rakhi se shaadi karne ke liye kon jayega? But to my surprise, there were many guys (common what is wrong with you guys!!!) dying to marry her, and after some elimination rounds 16 guys were selected for the Swayamwar.

Just like another reality shows all the contestants (yeah that’s what they call them, they are competing for a big prize named Rakhi!!!) had to perform some tasks. Tasks including walking on the fire, dancing, singing, going to group date (lol), writing lover letter and some other challenging tasks. I just can’t digest it, performing some task as a contestant to marry a girl!!! I guess that would be the last thing on the earth I will do.

Alright coming back to Rakhi, in her interviews to answer the question “Aapko kaisa ladka chahiye?” She replied “Bilkul confident ho meri tarah, duniya se lade, samna karne ki takat ho (bodyguard chahiye kya???) 6 pack na ho chalega but badi tummy bhi nahi honi chahiye. Fit ho bilkul army man ki tarah. Dimag ho, Talent ho, etc etc”
Yar muje ek baat batao, agar itna sab kuchh hoga bande mai to woh fir tere se shaadi kyo karega ??

Some more from her interview, jab S maata ka swamwar ho sakta hai.. une Ram mil sakta hai tu muje kyo nahi mil sakta. (Kyo ki woh S thi and tum Rakhi). Muje yakin hai ki muje Ram na mile par Shyam to jaroor mil jayega. (Ha Ramlaal to jaroor mil hi jayenge).

Talking about the contestants. Sab ek se badh kar ek hai… koi body builder to koi filmy ashiq, Koi shadi shudha to koi girlfriend wala, Koi police wala to ko businessman. Even there was a software engineer also (yar I know techie ki life mai bahut lafde hote hai but itne bhi nahi ki Rakhi se shaadi karni pade!!!)

Some cheesy dialogues from the show…
Rakhi: Udna chahti hu mai, Fly karna chahti hu mai.
The Guy: Chalo mai tumhare pankh ban jata hu.
Rakhi’s bro (yeah they have come up with Rakhi’s bro as well): Kitna kamate ho?
The Guy: Utna ki rakhi ka guzara kar saku. (Bete ye bahut pahunchi huyi cheez hai aise hi guzara nahi ho sakta)
The Guy greeting Rakhi: Aaja mera baccha!!
Rakhi: Packing ho gai?
The Guy: Ha kapde pack kar liya aur bhi bahut kuchh.. bahut sari yadain...

Apni Rakhi bhi kam nahi hai… Usko har kisi se pyar ho gaya… sab se deep feelings ho gaye. “Ab nahi kar sakti mai. Yaha ek ek kar ke sare dulhe jaa rahe hai. Koi muje puchho kya feel hota hai. Kitna dard hota hai” yar Rakhi India mai I guess tum ek se jyada ladko se shaadi to nahi kar paogi… fir ye drama kyo? But she is really a drama queen, in some other occasion she was justifying her image. “Mai modern hu, bold hu, item girl hu, chhote kapde pahnti hu par apni limits cross nahi karti” Limits!!! Do you know what does that mean?
Sab ladko ke mom dad ko in laws bolna, sabko bolna ki mai aapse pyar karne lagi hu. Mera dulha… too much yar…

After meeting one of the families, Itna achha laga.. jis tarah se mamma ne muje itni badi smile ke saath aarti uteri. halwa khilaya, tika lagaya, flowers diye, gift diya. (I am really confused Rakhi, Kis cheez se itna khush ho gai tum? Halwe se, tike se, flowers se ki gift se? ya fir family ko milke?)

Muje sab khana banana aata hai (koi na bhi puchhe to bahi ) aur uske baad jaise explain kiya, sab ki samaj mai aa gaya ki kitna aata hai. Bechari chup nahi rah sakti na wahi problem hai, samaj mai nahi aata kitna bolna chahiye and fir galat bol jati hai.

Manas ko dekh ke muje laga ki woh muje protect kar sakta hai, meri dhaal ban sakta hai. (fir se tum bodyguard wale gun dekhne lagi!! Rakhi tumhe shaadi karni hai bodyguard nahi chahiye) Jis tarah se who pissed off huye... gussa kiye... n then a big I-love-him-so-much-smile. Manas ko gussa aaya... muje itna achha laga... ki manas ne stand uthaya... Ek waqt tha jab mere liye koi khada nahi rahta tha... aaj ek waqt hai ke mere liye sab khade rahte hai. Mere saath ek chhoti si galat cheez huyi... uske liye baat kar rahe hai...jagda kar rahe hai... ek achhi cheez ke liye lad rahe hai... (yar aaj bhi wahi waqt hai, bas show hai logo ko publicity mil rahi hai is liye sab tere stand le rahe hai)

In one of the interview she told that her favorite color is Black and Red. But when a guy came in Blue color, she was like. Aapne blue color ka shire pahna hai, mera favorite hai and again the I-love-him-so-much-smile. (yar tum kya bande ke shirt ke color se apna favorite color decide karti ho???)

Ab jaha pe rakhi ho and Kiss controversy na ho aisa chalega kya???
Is show mai bhi kiss controversy huyi… A guy called Love tried kissing her (this time not on her lips though) and it made a big controversy. Though Rakhi liked it but there was a huge pressure from other contestants. Agar Love kiss kar sakta hai to hum bhi kar sakte hai (yar nobody has doubt on anybody’s kissing abilities. Relax!!!) Agar woh next round se bahar nahi hota hai to hum chale jayenga… Finally Rakhi ne show ki thodi kadar karte huye ek statement diya… “Love ne bhi achha nahi kiya. Aap ek ladki se saath dance kar rahe hai jo aapki hone wali biwi hai... aap aisa nahi kar sakte” And she eliminated that guy.

Also looks like there is another controversy on her way.
It seems an FIR has been filed against Rakhi for stealing the concept of a marriage-based TV reality show from a private portal!!
http://www.rakhikaswayamvar.co.cc/2009/07/court-orders-fir-against-rakhi-five.html
When there is so much happening in the show, Fem, who sponsored the show, tried to advertise their products. Dekho koi kitni gatiya ad bana sakta hai… Once Rakhi says, sundar ban jau? kitni der lagegi? 15 minutes. Fem lagadu, bleach kardu. But I guess it is working. People do notice the ad and do remember that.

As per the show information on net - “When the show reaches its grand finale time and Rakhi finally gets down to making her final choice amongst the last remaining contestants, the makers of the show will be giving the contestants an option of either choosing big money or Rakhi. The guys will opt for the money bag over Rakhi.”

I am bit curious, jo bhi finalist hoga who paisa lega ki Rakhi??? Agar shadi hoti hai to kab tak chalegi? Kya Rakhi Finalist se shaadi karegi? Jaan ne ke liye dekhte rahiye “Rakhi Ka Swayamvar”